The Free Islands of The Coarsal Pirates is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by High Captain Balman with a fair hand, and remarkable for its flagrant waste-dumping, daily referendums, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 7.288 billion Pirates live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Industry also on the agenda, while Law & Order and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Blacklake Isle. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Coarsal economy, worth a remarkable 2,608 trillion gold marks a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Soda Sales, and Gambling. Average income is an amazing 357,934 gold marks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.

Fast-food chefs regularly win Health Innovation Awards for spitting on burgers, psychiatrists that date patients are congratulated on their romantic conquests, the government regularly hires contractors to construct high rise apartments, and the "Dreadnowt" is the pride and joy of the Coarsal Navy. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. The Coarsal Pirates's national animal is the kraken, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Alcoholism.

The Coarsal Pirates is ranked 413^th in the world and 17^th in Osiris for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 357,934.21 Standard Monetary Units.